Remember the old saying: “Children learn by example.” ADHD children are no exception to this adage; they are highly intelligent and will observe how you, as a parent, cope with everyday struggles. Likewise, ADHD children appreciate knowing that all of us wrestle with problems, regardless of our age, abilities, and position in life.

Imagine what it’s like to feel overwhelmed while everyone around you appears to be calm, cool, and in control. Children with ADHD can relate to this feeling, whether they’re dealing with ADHD in school or ADHD relationship problems. How can you help your ADHD child realize that he or she is not the only one feeling this way? Share stories about the challenges you’re facing and apologize when you’ve “screwed up.” Obviously, you may not want to divulge problems like financial woes or marital spats, but you send a powerful yet positive message to children when you admit that you’ve made a mistake.

The thing is, children will pick up on the fact that you are wrong sometimes, and they will also notice when you don’t acknowledge it. To the ADHD child, it often seems like adults are quick to criticize yet slow to confess to their own shortcomings. By correcting your own errors, your children will see that making a mistake is not the end of the world, and they will feel more confident in your abilities as a person and a parent.

So what should you do when you’ve been caught in a slip-up? Say you’re sorry, and tell your children about what you’ve done. Then, if necessary, tell them the steps you will take to correct the blunder. Finally, follow up on your promises to fix your mistake as much as humanly possible.

Kids—especially ADHD kids—like to see that their parents are human. By showing your ADHD child that you have shortcomings, you are teaching him or her that it’s okay to be imperfect, and a mistake does not make you a total failure. You are also showing your children that being an adult means taking responsibility for your actions and improving your relationships through asking forgiveness.