Developing
Self-Esteem in the ADHD Child
Self-esteem
provides an important foundation for every child and adult,
yet as important as it is, self-esteem is also easily damaged.
Children with ADHD and learning disabilities are especially
prone to a having a delicate self-esteem.
Parents and
other family members can be very influential in developing
healthy self-esteem for the ADHD child. First, it helps for
the parent to understand what self-esteem is. Self-esteem
is how we feel about ourselves. These “self-perceptions”
affect our attitude, behavior, emotions, coping skills, and
ability to adjust in life. For example, children who have
positive thoughts about themselves are typically better at
handling obstacles and stress. They are optimistic, resist
bad influences, and feel generally happy.
However,
kids with low self-esteem have a difficult time solving problems.
When a child believes he or she is bad or unworthy, it leads
to feelings of anxiety, frustration, and depression. The child
with low self-esteem is more likely to give up in the face
of temporary setbacks. For instance, when presented with school
problems, children with ADHD and low self-esteem are apt
to quit the lesson instead of try again.
Self-esteem
begins in infancy and can be improved or harmed throughout
life. Self-esteem comes from a combination of being capable
and being loved. An example of feeling capable is when a child
succeeds after trying multiple times to do something, such
as learning to ride a bike. In addition to feeling capable,
a child needs to feel unconditional love from adults to have
good self-esteem.
As a parent,
here are some ways you and family members can improve self-esteem
in any child, including the ADHD child:
- Be careful about what
you say. Your words are powerful, and your child will
take them to heart.
- Praise your child for
both successes and efforts. Even if the child doesn’t
succeed, you can say that you’re proud of the effort
put forth.
- Show affection. Give
hugs and express your love verbally.
- Always respect your
child.
- Involve your child
in an activity that illustrates his or her talents.
- Offer praise at least
twice as much as criticism.
While it’s
best to begin fostering good self-esteem as soon as the child
is born, it’s never too late to begin building your
child’s self-esteem. If you are parenting
an ADHD child or children, don’t be afraid to ask
your children how they feel about themselves and their abilities.
This would be a great place to begin the self-esteem building
process.
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