The
ADD/ADHD Parent Checklist for a Peaceful Home
You feel
like you’ve said it a thousand times: “Please
put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher,” or, “Please
mow the lawn today.” But no matter how much you threaten
to take away the TV or ground your child for a week, the dishes
remain untouched and the grass keeps on growing. Power struggles
like these can happen in any home, and are certainly found
in homes where one or more family members are diagnosed with
ADHD. To promote a home environment with more peace, harmony,
and mutual respect, consider this ADD/ADHD parent checklist:
Set reasonable rules and
consequences for breaking the rules. Your ADD/ADHD parent
checklist should include clear, fair consequences for your
child if he or she becomes defiant. Similar to an employee
handbook, you may find it very helpful to outline exactly
what your child can expect as far as losing privileges like
TV or computer time, but keep it simple. If you make the punishments
too harsh, you risk humiliating the child and being unable
to enforce the rules you set forth.
Give yourself a timeout.
You are the key to completing the ADD/ADHD parent checklist
for a peaceful home. Therefore, it’s up to you to be
aware about your own angry feelings. Before you lose control
and possibly say something you’ll regret later, tell
your child that you need a 10-minute timeout.
Find a neutral place to talk
it out. Schedule regular, heart-to-heart talks with your child
at a place that will encourage your child to listen and open
up. Examples of talking times might be a park, ice cream parlor,
or while walking the dog. When you complete this part of the
ADD/ADHD parent checklist, make sure that you tell your child
how important he or she is to the family, and explain how
misbehavior hurts other people. One of the very positive qualities
of children with ADHD is that they are acutely sensitive and
understanding of other people’s feelings.
Give your child a chance
to do it right the next time. Children often take criticism
to heart, especially when they’ve tried their best to
make you happy. Put room in your ADD/ADHD parent checklist
for second chances. If you do find fault in something your
children have done, show them how you’d like it done
differently; then give them a chance, right away, to try again.
As a hardworking parent who
wants everything to go well, it’s very easy to fall
into the crime-and-punishment trap, which means it’s
almost too tempting to scold a child for falling short of
expectations. That’s why assembling your own personal
ADD/ADHD parent checklist provides a great reference for you
to fall back on when you feel frazzled, enabling you to avoid
power struggles and promote peace within the home.
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